These beautiful and intelligent people wrote

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  LoganReply

  September 10, 2009 at 5:38 am

  This is no real event, but may help Bob understand that things could be worse – even if I fear Bob’s day is far from over.

  When you have an ‘I Hate My Job’-day, try this:

  On your way home from work, stop at your pharmacy and go to the thermometer section and purchase a rectal thermometer made by Johnson & Johnson

  Be very sure you get this brand. When you get home, lock your doors, draw the curtains and disconnect the phone so you will not be disturbed.

  Change into very comfortable clothing and sit in your favorite chair. Open the package and remove the thermometer. Now, carefully place it on a table or a surface so that it will not become chipped or broken.

  Now the fun part begins .

  Take out the literature from the box and read it carefully You will notice that in small print there is a statement:

  ‘Every Rectal Thermometer made by Johnson & Johnson is personally tested and then sanitized. ‘

  Now, close your eyes and repeat out loud five times, ‘I am so glad I do not work in the thermometer quality control department at Johnson & Johnson.’

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  BartimaeusReply

  September 11, 2009 at 3:15 am

  @Logan: Ha! You just made my day, there.

  And as for me… no I’ve never had any first-day-of-work horror stories. Primarily because I’m still in college.

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  Theala SildorianReply

  September 11, 2009 at 9:38 am

  I had one, though it doesn’t come close to Bob’s.

  I was working for a travel nurse company, and was starting a new assignment in the ER in a hospital in California. I had talked to the manager on the phone a couple of days before I started to find out when and where I needed to go.

  When I showed up at 8am, on time, turned out the charge nurse had no idea I was coming, didn’t have a preceptor for me, and didn’t know what to do with me.

  She gave me the nickel tour, and shortly thereafter the place started getting busy. A woman came in with severe pre-eclampsia (high blood pressure in pregnancy). I ended up doing a one on one caring for the lady who was on powerful medication and needed constant blood pressure and fetal monitoring. We were trying to prevent a seizure until we could transfer her to another hospital that had a unit that could handle this very serious problem.

  I quaked in my boots the whole time. I hadn’t worked ER in over a year, and never had a patient with this kind of problem. I didn’t know anyone there, and so didn’t know who to talk to if I had a concern, and didn’t know where to find anything I needed. The patient did OK, and her problem was under control by the time the ambulance came to transport her. But that was a scary day for the new kid!